What do readers possibly love more than books? Why coffee of course! (And if you only drink tea, sorry— this isn’t for you. I wish I had your restraint when it comes to espresso.) Some of you might know that I work at Barnes and Noble as a barista in the Starbucks café section of the store. I used to just drink coffee but now I breathe it in daily and if the shift is stressful enough I often have nightmares about it. Yay! That all being said, I came up with this brilliant idea while watching debate night on SNL. Essentially if every seasonal Starbucks drink resonated with a single book, these would be the ones! Enjoy 🙂
*Side note: if you haven’t already caught on, this is a parody.
Pumpkin Spice— Ah, my classic favorite. This desiccant drink is a homage to my favorite time of year, autumn. And like my favorite season, it reminds me of my favorite court: the Autumn Court in Sarah J Maas’s A Court of Thorns and Roses trilogy. PSL is a notorious North American drink that is more often loved than hated in many ways like an SJM book.
A familiar name for a well known book series, one that will likely be spotted on anyone’s book social media account—like the pumpkin spice epidemic during September through October.
Caramel Apple Spice— Don’t let the pretty name fool you, there’s absolutely NO caramel in this drink save for the toppings on the whipped cream! It’s steamed apple cider with cinnamon dolce syrup. It seems as though it will be spicy, but this one is actually painstakingly sweet. Like, toothache sweet hidden behind a misleading name. Almost like most of the characters from Maggie Stiefvater’s Raven Cycle series.
Her troupe of YA rebels, namely Ronan Lynch, appears bitter and strong like a spiced espresso drink at first chapter, but after four books of dark inner monologue and angst ridden character development, Ronan is revealed to be one of the sweetest characters in the YA genre ever written. Example: he cuddles barn animals (and Adam).
Chile Mocha— Not as potent as you might think, although not entirely displeasing. The Chile Mocha can be either a coffee based drink or a hot chocolate with some zest added to the mix. A newer drink for 2016, this one is similar to The Girl From Everywhere by Heidi Heilig.
If you have a map in this book, no matter if it’s derived from a fictional realm or reality, you can travel through time to that destination. This drink is bland, like a slate map, but with a little “Chile powder” brewed in, it can be quite the trip! (But honestly, I hate this drink. Loved the book though.)
Salted Caramel Mocha— Similar to the Carmel Apple Spice, you will find absolutely no caramel in this concoction save for the toppings! (Side note: Honestly, Starbucks has an affinity for naming drinks Carmel Whatever the Hell and not using the specific syrup at all.)
This drink is slightly bitter because of it’s combined mocha powder and toffee nut syrup— making for a dark taste that still surprisingly delicious. Much like The Star-Touched Queen by Roshani Chokshi, this drink aligns perfectly with our heroine’s horoscope: dark and forbidding but with a pinch of sweetness that can roughly be translated as a loophole in the story. A drink fit for a runaway Princess turned Bride of the Underworld.
Peppermint Mocha— Who doesn’t love peppermint mocha? It’s tasty and spontaneous, always popping up on the menu when you least expect it (because it was available the day after Halloween…heaven forbid we actually wait until it’s winter). This minty fresh latte is as clean as the skin of Dirty Hands himself—Kaz Brekker from Leigh Bardugo’s Six of Crows duology.
Refreshing enough to keep you on your toes at every waking moment (or perhaps that’s just the amount of caffeine poured into it) this drink reminds me of the action packed streets of Ketterdam and our beloved Crows.
Caramel Brulée— Elegant and often hard to pronounce if you’re not a Starbucks regular or don’t speak French, this drink is a liquid version of Donna Tartt’s The Secret History.
CB is a refined latte, one of the more entitled drinks on the menu that nearly smells like privilege and private school if you’re around it often enough to get a whiff. But don’t let that scent trick you, this drink is actually dark and bitter—like the ending of the book. A pretty beverage with a wicked twist.
Chestnut Praline— Nostalgic for the season, this one in particular smells like a bonfire… or perhaps it’s more like A Torch Against the Night. The sequel to Sabaa Tahir’s An Ember in the Ashes, ATATN and CP share a similar smoky essence that reminisces long nights of staying up late and wondering how to overthrow your government system. It’s memorable and always easy to fall back on if your other favorites are sold out, kind of like the heroine in this story.
Eggnog— Simple, but delicious. A frilly drink that’s neither light nor dark, or bitter or sweet. Eggnog Lattes are easy to make and comforting to drink. This relaxing vibe shares similar aesthetics with Wink Poppy Midnight by April Genevieve Tucholke. It’s quirky and reminds me of snowfall, like the trio in WPM as they portray regular teenagers from a quaint contemporary town that turns mystical after a few chapters or sips.
Gingerbread— Rustic and rugged, like the historical setting of the YA debut by Kerri Maniscalco, Stalking Jack the Ripper. Gingerbread is meant to be ripped apart into smaller cookie sized shapes, like the dough itself has translated into it’s own anatomy of sugar and spice.
And just like the dissection of this treat, the book follows our protagonist who studies the broken parts of corpses. But as oddly tasting as Gingerbread may seem, and as bizarre as Audrey Rose Wadsworth, it has an old aesthetic that makes me think of horse drawn carriages and dusk lit London streets.
That’s all for now, else I’d lose my mind trying to compare the scent of coconut to Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake. If any of this made sense to you, let me know! If not, well then I at least hope you got a good laugh out of it. Drink up, bibliophiles.